Red Right Blog |
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Rants, Rates, Slags, Slates. Manic-depressive posts from Red Wright-Hand. Because there are thousands of worthless blogs out there and who am I not to add to their number?
Total US troop deaths in Iraq to date (09/01/07) since 03/20/03: 3739
From 05/02/03 through 06/28/04: 718 Myeloma (etc.) Blogs
Adventures of Cancer Girl Browse
Arts & Letters Daily
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Wednesday, October 29, 2003
Steve from Korea writes: "Many Koreans think 'Joanie Loves Chachi' is the greatest TV show of all time. Why? Because 'cha-chi' means 'penis' in Korean. On a totally unrelated note: there's a punk band in New York called 'Joanie Loves Trotsky.'" Red's note: Yeah, but do they know Korea is a peninsula? Monday, October 27, 2003
For Halloween, a list of some of the creepiest songs ever recorded (that I can think of): Frankie Teardrop by Suicide #2 in the Model Home Series by Guided by Voices King Ink by The Birthday Party Untitled [track 11, CD 2, from Selected Ambient Works Volume II] by Aphex Twin Atlantis by Sun Ra [not really a song, I concede] Rub 'Til it Bleeds by PJ Harvey and, naturally, Red Right Hand by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds Seven off the top of my head. Should you think of any I should add, drop me a line. Button seen in Philadelphia supermarket: "BUG BUSH -- ELECT STREET" I'm not endorsing anyone or anything, I'm just reporting what I saw. Wednesday, October 22, 2003
I recently learned that a former college housemate of mine died late last year in a fire. I don’t know the circumstances, only that a couple of lines on the subject appeared in my college alumni rag (scroll nearly to the bottom). David Carne McKinney. A fellow two classes ahead of me, in fact, he’d already graduated by the time we ended up rooming in the same house. Bass player. Terminal mumbler. Serious political lefty. Cranky and clumsy. Moved from East Coast to Berkeley, CA in 1982. Last seen by me in December 1991, at which time he appeared to be the same cranky, awkward mumbling left-wing loser who used to forget to put the milk carton back in the refrigerator when he was finished with it. I miss him. At this time I would like to acknowledge the birth of my newest nephew. He is: named Daniel; two months old; countermanding Death. Monday, October 20, 2003
Steven from South Korea writes: " WWRGD? (What Would Richard Gere Do?) or CHARLATANS....I saw what looked like a Buddhist monk (robes, shaved head) walking from shop to shop, begging for money by banging a little hand drum. Hmmm--was this some lower-order initiate or acolyte learning humility by living off the kindness of others for a prescribed period? Guess again. A Korean friend told me that there are lots of bogus Buddhists (my phrase, not his) who get the robes/shaved head look down and try to scam money from businesses. Not many people buy the shtick, but I guess enough do to make them still do it. It ain't televangelism, but they're learning fast, those Koreans!" Friday, October 17, 2003
So that really was Nicolas Cage I saw behind Independence Hall on Tuesday. My neighborhood hasn't been so fouled up by a bloated movie crew since Jersey Girl filmed here last summer. That's right, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez Themselves, in August 2002, shot scenes for a movie just a few paces from my apartment...yet that was well over a year ago and Jersey Girl still hasn't been released and I just can't imagine what's causing the delay. Thursday, October 16, 2003
More from Busan: "COMIC MISUNDERSTANDING OF THE WEEK: I asked a student what she did during the weekend. I thought she said 'I watched the Spice Girls on MTV.' What she said was, 'I rode my bicycle at the beach.' Do I have some subconscious obsession with Baby Spice? Or is Koreans' pronunciation of English THAT bad? You decide." Wednesday, October 15, 2003
I've been meaning for a while to write something about Arnold Schwarzenegger's election to the governorship of California, but find myself stymied each time I begin. This isn't at all like seeing some album you know is wretched perched atop the Billboard charts, or some similar movie inhaling the box office. This is the real thing...or is it the unreal thing? Has Philip K. Dick taken his revenge upon us from beyond the grave? (PKD was a nearly lifelong Californian, remember.) Arnold Schwarzenegger, a human special effect with no political experience at all, will be governor of California, the most populated state in the nation, simply because he oozes charisma. The United States deserves every hateful insult that overseas countries can devise. You want Schwarzenegger's curriculum vitae? Well here it fucking is. What have you done, you damned Californians? What on earth have you done? You know, until very recently, when I had bad days on this side of the country, I still used to fantasize about jumping in a car and driving non-stop till I got to California. You know, to make my life over and everything. I've been to the Bay Area and it's stunning. But you know what? No fucking more. And since California's now likely to get bailed out with Federal $$$ courtesy of W. Bush, people will say Schwarzenegger's done a great job, too. I hope that fucking state breaks off and sinks to the bottom of the Pacific. Thursday, October 09, 2003
For the four of you who've been paying attention, I am pleased to present the first posting from my South Korean correspondent, our Man in Busan, Steven K (click on the Poetry Plus + 20 link): "Today five of my students were admitted to the hospital after I tried to teach them some of the actors' warm-up exercises I used as a high school drama director, such as the chorus to 'I Am So Proud' from THE MIKADO: To sit in solemn silence in a dull, dark, dock In a pestilential prison with a life-long lock Awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp, shock From a cheap and chippy chopper on a big, black, block. "I finished the rest off by trying to get them to say, 'The sixth sheik's sixth son's sheep's sick.' I also discussed with my adult students the curious concept of 'fan death.' You see, most Koreans are convinced that if you go to sleep with the windows closed and a fan blowing on you, you can die from some combination of asphyxiation and hypothermia. And if you try to disabuse them of this, um, interesting notion, many will claim that it is a scientifically provable fact. And if you persist in your incredulity, you will be met that curious expression on the Koreans' faces that is the result of two conflicting emotions fighting it out--The Teacher Must Be Respected vs. Americans are Stupid, Arrogant Asses. "In other news, the Pusan Internation Film Festival is wrapping up today and tomorrow, with just about every dang movie plumb sold out. I wanted to go see Gus Van Sant's latest, Elephant, tonight, but there was NO chance to score a tik. This is all a shock to me--Korean pop culture is usually about as lowest-common-denominator as you can imagine. This is a serious hard-working culture, and (so my theory goes), people want their entertainment to be fairly mindless. So it a surprise to see that there IS a niche for challenging, cutting edge films out here. Who knew?" So there you have it, folks, one Westerner's cultural impressions straight from the Korean peninsula. And speaking of which..... ....imagine if you will a grubby apartment building underneath an interstate ramp in some second- or third-tier American city. The time: 2:39 AM. Inside that building is one of its many beat-up efficiency rooms, across whose thin, booger-green and cigarette-burned carpet lies a crusty scattering of fast food wrappers, skin mags, movie mags, celebrity mags and empty cans of Miller. Tacked to one peeling wall is a large color blow-up of Uma Thurman's bare feet, photographed in adoring close-up. Underneath the photo is a flickering tv set playing an endless loop of clips from martial arts films (and pretty quality clips, it must be admitted: top tier Shaw Bros. stuff). Standing in the middle of the room is Quentin Tarantino, stark naked. His beady gaze shifts back and forth in an undying cycle between the photograph and the tv screen. His penis is hard, and he is rubbing it without cease, and he is panting "Oh man, oh man, oh man...." Imagine this for two hours. Congratulations. You have just seen Kill Bill Vol. 1. Tuesday, October 07, 2003
Yes, I'm still alive, just very very busy. Here, check out this South Korean film festival, that ought to hold you till I have time to write something semi-coherent. |
