Red Right Blog |
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Rants, Rates, Slags, Slates. Manic-depressive posts from Red Wright-Hand. Because there are thousands of worthless blogs out there and who am I not to add to their number?
Total US troop deaths in Iraq to date (09/01/07) since 03/20/03: 3739
From 05/02/03 through 06/28/04: 718 Myeloma (etc.) Blogs
Adventures of Cancer Girl Browse
Arts & Letters Daily
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Wednesday, August 27, 2003
And finally, this terrible milepost: as of today, even taking into account the contradictory methods of toting up US military casualties (at last, a job for Worldcom), it is certain that more American soldiers have died in Iraq since May 1, when President Bush declared that "major combat operations in Iraq have ended," than died in the previous weeks of declared war. Of course, the president never participated in even a minor combat operation, so his confusion may be excused. Put mathematically, we are averaging slightly over one death of a serviceman daily in Iraq, and I don't want to forget this, even as I'm laughing at the SuperFriends. Now this is the funniest thing I've seen in weeks. Not as interactive as the make-your-own-Bush speech I linked to some weeks back, but more hysterical and anal-retentively creative...hours of viewing pleasure...particularly if you're male...and of a certain age. Don't pass up the little movie clips either, they're some choice stuff! My favorite: Batgirl exclaiming that she just landed on "something hard." Kevin Smith, you will never be this humorous, please stop making movies, now. Good. I hate Worldcom, or MCI, or whatever alias they're using this hour. They were my wireless provider until late last summer, when their innovative methods of bookkeeping began to receive some mild publicity. They socked me with an insane roaming fee on the last bill I received, which I refused to pay for several months, and then when I finally did pay it, they said I hadn't. I told their bill collectors to fuck off. Haven't heard from any of those nice people for a few months now...gee, I hope nothing bad happened to any of them. Monday, August 25, 2003
The new Guided by Voices album, Earthquake Glue, is not bad (you can presently listen to the whole thing on the band's website and judge for yourself) but neither is it especially memorable, or so it strikes me at the moment. (I didn't win one of the golden tickets, either.) So once again you can forget about a return to the classic mid-90s period of Bee Thousand and Alien Lanes. A guy I know told me yesterday that the last time he saw GBV in concert (that would be last year), a more-inebriated-than-usual Robert Pollard yelled from the stage: "People talk about the classic line-up of GBV....FUCK the classic line-up!" So that explains that. Meanwhile, this large-hearted boy is a big fan of the pigpen, so check him out; I even added him to my side-menu Hall of Clickable Fame. Wednesday, August 20, 2003
Just to prove I'm not entirely morose 24/7, I hereby post my proposed lyrics to "Love Theme from Gigli." I can just imagine some studio employee conjecturing that all the movie really needed to avoid its leper-status at the box-office was a solid ballad for Jennifer Lopez to belt over the closing credits. But hell, I didn't even see the movie; for all I know, Jennifer Lopez does sing some horrible song as the tail end of the movie unspools to a theaterful of empty seats. Things to bear in mind while reading: 1. Like I said, I haven't seen the movie, so these lyrics are based entirely on reviews and hearsay. 2. Imagine these words set to some shitty Hollywood ear-punisher of your choice. Heartlight, Evergreen, you know what I mean? Real sludge. 3. There was a third thing but now I can't remember what it was. LOVE THEME FROM GIGLI I was lost and I was drifting, been hurt by so many guys I’d gotten used to finding love between a woman’s thighs I did what the mob guys told me, I killed here and I killed there Once I pushed some old lady in front of the D train, you could say I just didn’t care And then one day they sent me out, to keep an eye on some kidnapped kid You opened your door, you opened your heart, do you know what you’ve done did? Ohhhhh Gigli, you really really make me feel so high I think I fell for you when I watched you saw the thumb off that dead guy Ohhhhh Gigli, I really think we’re meant for one another I’m gonna do some yoga then spend my life with you... After days in your apartment with that cute retarded boy Your muscles and your forehead ridge became an everlasting joy My life is now a sundae, and you’re the maraschino Let’s run away together, I think you’re sexier than Al Pacino, and... Gigli, you really are my special kind of guy You’re the one man in the Mob who’ll Do me when I say “Gobble, gobble” Gigli, you’re the sun who chases away the rain I'm writing my girlfriend a letter that reads “Dear Jaaaaaaaaaaaane” Tuesday, August 19, 2003
A note that I've re-published the figures of American troop deaths to reflect those supplied by the Department of Defense and the Iraq Coalition Casualty Count, but I am also republishing the link to this article. For those of you writing in to bitch about me being some sort of ghoul, I reply that I am only reprinting official figures which come from a branch of the United States government; I don't enjoy seeing those numbers go up, quite the contrary. In fact, I could easily be accused of jingoism, or nationalistic self-centrism (or something) as I am entirely omitting available figures on other coalition (i.e., British) forces, not to mention the high but imprecise numbers for Iraqi military and civilian deaths, or today's murders of United Nations workers. I just don't want anyone to think that war takes a summer vacation. So it turns out that Idi Amin , that sweetheart syphillitic cannibal whose name became a Western household word after the 1976 Israeli raid on Entebbe, spent the last couple of decades enjoying a quiet exile in Saudi Arabia. You remember Saudi Arabia. They're our friends who we helped out in the First Gulf War. The monarchy that can claim 78.94% of the September 11th hijackers as citizens, a wonderful relationship with the present US administration, and a human rights record that takes a back seat to none. I guess Amin must have snuck in under the Saudi radar or something. Thursday, August 14, 2003
I'm breaking radio silence once again to point out that Harvey Pekar is prominently featured in today's issue of USA Today, including his mug on the front page, upper right corner. Longtime fans exult: there is some justice in this world. We now return you to your revised (as in higher) death count of US forces in Iraq, adjusted by the US military to "to take account of soldiers wounded in action who later died of their wounds." Sunday, August 10, 2003
Breaking my vows, this tentative post while vacationing, from a very slow connection in my hotel room. The sun is having its own problems out of doors. Looking forward to a campfire and more seafood tonight. Oh boy, what a dead giveway to my location. Wednesday, August 06, 2003
You'll all be fascinated to learn that the air-conditioning has been out today at my place of employ, and I am suffocating. But the head honchos may let us bail early. Meanwhile, what should I read at the beach this weekend? I just... can't... decide.... |
