Red Right Blog |
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Rants, Rates, Slags, Slates. Manic-depressive posts from Red Wright-Hand. Because there are thousands of worthless blogs out there and who am I not to add to their number?
Total US troop deaths in Iraq to date (09/01/07) since 03/20/03: 3739
From 05/02/03 through 06/28/04: 718 Myeloma (etc.) Blogs
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Arts & Letters Daily
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Thursday, October 09, 2003
For the four of you who've been paying attention, I am pleased to present the first posting from my South Korean correspondent, our Man in Busan, Steven K (click on the Poetry Plus + 20 link): "Today five of my students were admitted to the hospital after I tried to teach them some of the actors' warm-up exercises I used as a high school drama director, such as the chorus to 'I Am So Proud' from THE MIKADO: To sit in solemn silence in a dull, dark, dock In a pestilential prison with a life-long lock Awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp, shock From a cheap and chippy chopper on a big, black, block. "I finished the rest off by trying to get them to say, 'The sixth sheik's sixth son's sheep's sick.' I also discussed with my adult students the curious concept of 'fan death.' You see, most Koreans are convinced that if you go to sleep with the windows closed and a fan blowing on you, you can die from some combination of asphyxiation and hypothermia. And if you try to disabuse them of this, um, interesting notion, many will claim that it is a scientifically provable fact. And if you persist in your incredulity, you will be met that curious expression on the Koreans' faces that is the result of two conflicting emotions fighting it out--The Teacher Must Be Respected vs. Americans are Stupid, Arrogant Asses. "In other news, the Pusan Internation Film Festival is wrapping up today and tomorrow, with just about every dang movie plumb sold out. I wanted to go see Gus Van Sant's latest, Elephant, tonight, but there was NO chance to score a tik. This is all a shock to me--Korean pop culture is usually about as lowest-common-denominator as you can imagine. This is a serious hard-working culture, and (so my theory goes), people want their entertainment to be fairly mindless. So it a surprise to see that there IS a niche for challenging, cutting edge films out here. Who knew?" So there you have it, folks, one Westerner's cultural impressions straight from the Korean peninsula. And speaking of which..... ....imagine if you will a grubby apartment building underneath an interstate ramp in some second- or third-tier American city. The time: 2:39 AM. Inside that building is one of its many beat-up efficiency rooms, across whose thin, booger-green and cigarette-burned carpet lies a crusty scattering of fast food wrappers, skin mags, movie mags, celebrity mags and empty cans of Miller. Tacked to one peeling wall is a large color blow-up of Uma Thurman's bare feet, photographed in adoring close-up. Underneath the photo is a flickering tv set playing an endless loop of clips from martial arts films (and pretty quality clips, it must be admitted: top tier Shaw Bros. stuff). Standing in the middle of the room is Quentin Tarantino, stark naked. His beady gaze shifts back and forth in an undying cycle between the photograph and the tv screen. His penis is hard, and he is rubbing it without cease, and he is panting "Oh man, oh man, oh man...." Imagine this for two hours. Congratulations. You have just seen Kill Bill Vol. 1. |
